Not Gonna Make It

More than once, on car trips as a child, I'd announce that I had to pee, usually right after we had left our street. Exasperated parents would start looking for a restaurant while I desperately prayed to the gods of the Kegel and attempted not to wet the seat. I always KNEW I wouldn't make it, yet somehow I did. Disaster was always averted, somehow.

This was my really lame attempt to convey how panicked I am right now. Tests start next Friday, 9 days from now, and STILL all I know is Gross. Which would have been great last year at this time, but not so much now. I know renal and pulmonary path, but not neuro; the lecturer was so unintelligible, and skipped so much of his syllabus, that I don't even know where to begin in neuropath. In pharm, I'm well versed in pulmonary drugs, since I have almost all of them in my medicine cabinet (upper and lower respiratory), but I'm not so good at Parkinson's or epilepsy drugs, having never taken those (yet). Diuretics? HA! Behavioral ought to be pretty easy, fortunately. That ol' BS in BS (psych) is sorta paying off (still not worth the $50,000 it cost, but hey, I never thought it'd be worth anything). FCM is a strange conglomerate of path, physio, pharm, and real doctoring, all rolled into an adorable Spanish doc with an accent like Antonio Banderas. If only I weren't still about 8 lectures behind in that class... Physical Diagnosis shouldn't be too difficult, test-wise, but I still have 3 full H&P's (History and Physical exams to the uninformed) to complete and write up--in the week before tests start. Last but not least, PBL, my old nemesis, continues to throw patient cases at me and makes me write learning issues on the "Involuntary Commitment Process".

I'm a little panicky.

Oh, and I will be in the gross lab a good deal this weekend, since the first years have their Gross exam next Monday. Therefore, my last weekend before tests begin, I will spend studying SOMEONE ELSE'S MATERIAL. Never mind that I volunteered for this, never mind that I (supposedly) will get paid for my work in the lab. I just want to whine, and curl up in fetal position in a corner, and scratch my eyeballs out.

Only 7 months until the BOARDS. It's only going to go downhill from here. *sigh* I think alcoholism sounds like an acceptable alternative (to losing my mind). That, or I'm going to go drive buses again.